In a year that seems like all we did was disagree with one another (sometimes for the pure sake of disagreeing), I am glad we can all agree on at least ONE thing… 2020 was the most awkward year of our lives.
2020 brought some rough lessons and exposed who we are on the inside. Most of the time, it was ugly, but the fears presented…resulted in self reflection and a slower pace for many of our busy lives.
Pre 2020, I could already identify as a very fearful person. I have a long list of diverse fears. No matter my fears, I refused to be paralyzed by them. You keep living, right? Charge through. Look fear in the eye and beat it down. Keep having fun!
Well, 2020, The Year of Covid, increased our fears and literally immobilized us. What does that do to a person who fears being dormant and still? It can put you in an agonizing spot.
The fear that rules my life is the fear of being idle. I fear wasting my days and my years in monotony. I fear not challenging my mind and my body. I fear being still. And because of this fear, you will see me constantly in motion.
As 2020, The Year of Travel, came to a halt, my first reaction was that of disquietude. I am sure many of us felt this feeling as our lives started to cancel… one concert, one reservation, one event at a time. However, here I am, at the end of 2020 and I have never felt more comfortable with peaceful still moments. It is all about balance. Being still doesn’t mean laziness. It takes commitment, and it is a process, but I am very thankful for the growth this year. Even though there was so much I could not do this year, I learned to slow down and still have fun.
Each January, I award the new year a theme. Reflection at the end of each year helps name the following year.
The last few years, my bestie Cathy and I have dubbed themes together. 2019 was christened The Year of Revenge. We don’t quite remember why we named it that, but I think it was from our PTA President days. Being tired of the asinine “Nasty Grams” from anonymous PTA members, we concocted “revenge” replies. All in good fun, I promise.
On our flight to Panama this past January 2020, we decided it was The Year of Travel. We had so many big plans.
Although it wasn’t the jammed packed travel plans I expected, I still managed many (fun) small safe trips. The trips I had this year, brought me comfort and committed me to a quietness I often avoided. Some of my travels were in my back yard. I enjoyed exploring what my town had to offer and discovered many new parks. Other trips allowed me to enjoy time to journal, read, sit by myself, nature walk, keep simple schedules, focus on my health, and consider my relationships. I learned to eat healthier (except for the donut tour). I started to understand that I will disappoint some people based on my decisions and even though I hate that (like a lot a lot a lot) it’s more important to take care of me and my mental health.
What a perfectly imperfect year. Looking at all the pictures… it wasn’t what I planned, but so many amazing memories were made and it was a lot of fun! There is that saying, misery loves company… boy was there a lot of misery this year… but, cheers to not being a miserable guest for long!
Never forgetting fun, and the balance of the “quiet and busy” I learned in 2020, may 2021 be formally known as The Year of You Do You. I shall wear bold sparkly colors, fancy shoes, love those who are hard to love from a distance, and embrace fully those who are easy to love…and…
Go to Harvard to take psychology classes so I can get ANOTHER degree for the simple reason, that it makes me happy!
Happy New Year!
Travel Ninja 